We had a very special “Mother’s Day” breakfast at “Benton Park Cafe” with Allison, Daniel, Sadie, Kevin and me. My son had to work. With Great food and nice atmosphere, it’s one of my favorites in St. Louis. I had beer biscuits and gravy, fresh fruit, coffee and a Bloody Mary.
It’s a bit weird for me to say this but “Mother’s Day” doesn’t seem like a very special event for me anymore. My mother has been deceased for 11 years but even before that, I never held it as a special occasion which I have come to regret.
I am happy to be a mother to my son, grandma to Daniel and Sadie and mama to Eli and Peyton. I’m content in my roles.
To be honest, I’m not a nurturer. I wish I were. I’m a planner and problem solver. I’m a “taker-care-of-er”. I’m not sure what happened in my life to turn me into that type of mother.
But when Daniel was born and I spent time with him as he was developing, I did become that nurturer but only to him. I’m not sure why but I think maybe that’s abnormal to become that person to a grandchild…or maybe it’s very normal.
I don’t know other grandmas like that. They seem to be able to love and leave but I’ve had a hard time with that. I wanted to be an active and vital part of his life. I will say it’s caused problems and I’m not totally sure why it should have but I digress.
I’m not around Sadie on her day to day development so it feels different and probably more in line with the other type grandma’s that I spoke of earlier. The love is definitely there and so much joy watching her bloom but I don’t feel I’m vital to her development.
Enough of me pouring out crap on a blog!
I had a nice day. When I got home from St. Louis to my home in Columbia, I noticed the yard needed mowing. I was tired but needed some exercise and I love yard work.
Kevin went grocery shopping and I did the yard work….can you say role reversal? HA!
I have a very short week at work. I get off at noon Wednesday and travel back to St Louis for Allison’s honors ceremony and graduation. We’ll celebrate her graduation from nursing school with her and family.
Kevin and I will manage to catch a Cardinal game and maybe a few other things we don’t normally have time for when we go to “The Lou”
Back to running tomorrow after a needed day off.
~Happy Mother’s Day~