2016…a Wild Rollercoaster Ride

Each year I try to summarize my year whether good or bad…..here goes!

• I turned 56 years old
  
• I interviewed for a job in near San Francisco that didn’t pan out
  
• I spent almost 2 weeks of this past year in the hospital
  
• I had a cancer scare
  
• I had colon surgery where the surgeon removed 12 inches of my lower colon
  
• I became slightly hooked on pain pills for the first time in my life (I’m clean now)
  
• I started training for the Chicago Marathon 3 weeks after major surgery.
  
• I sadly went a whole year without seeing my sisters (Barb, Janice, Bev) and
  

  brother (Barry)
  

• I spent another year enjoying my grandchildren which I never take for
  

  granted
  

• I was blessed another year with a son and daughter in law who are doing a good job raising the most important things in my life and keeping them healthy and
  

  happy
  

• I was rewarded with another year loving and being loved by my furry children (Peyton and Eli)
  
• I had my DNA tested and found out that I’m 36% British, 25% Irish, 19% Western European, 9% Eastern European, 6% Scandinavian, 2% Iberian Peninsula and not a
  

  smitch of Native American blood which I grew up believing that I did
  

• I was pleased to spend another year with my best friend, playmate and lover (Kevin)
  
• I ran my 2nd marathon in a beautiful, big city…Love Chicago! (Chicago Marathon)
  
• I spent time with, ran with and ran the freaking Chicago Marathon with a good friend whom I had never met in person before this year.
  
• I experienced a Lou Malnati’s pizza in Chicago
  
• I stood under the Big Bean in Chicago
  
• I spent another year in love
  
• I visited Buddy Holly’s crash site in Clear Lake, Iowa
  
• I was less fit than the year before
  
• I unfortunately became more unhealthy
  
• I continually realized how lucky I am that I met and married Kevin
  
• I had a tough, frustrating and rewarding summer training for the Chicago Marathon
  
• I spent another 8 days in my favorite place in the world…Santa Cruz!!
  
• I hiked in a forest of Redwoods and touched a Sequoia
  
• I enjoyed the wild and crazy election season!
  
• I was jubilant that the crime family didn’t get into power on the Nov 8 election (I still pinch myself over this)
  
• I continue to realize that our current government has betrayed us deliberately
  
• I was surprised when my son penned a Mother’s Day post to me that made me cry. I never thought it possible.
  
• I ran on beaches in California including a yearly 4k along the coastline on trails
  
• I sat and listened to sea lions bark for hours again (one of my favorite California things)
  
• I watched a Los Lobos concert while riding a sky lift over a boardwalk
  
• I continue to believe that my dogs make me a better human being
  
• I felt myself aging quickly this year
  
• I still grieved over losing Jimmy
  
• I missed Tennessee badly
  
• I came to believe that the country has become irreparably divided by race
  
• I feared for our protectors…135 police officers died in 2016…up 250% from prior year
  
• I was lucky to still have a job that pays well
  
• I lost 2 cousins this year who died way too young
  
• I was paid for an article that I wrote about my weight loss and running journey as a contributing writer to an online health magazine and have an offer to write another.
  
• I lived another year in both my home in Columbia, Mo and an apartment in St. Louis, Mo
  
• I spent the best week of my year with Daniel at Camp MyMy in Columbia
  
• I visited Daniel at his Summer Camp…his first
  
• I gave money to charities and not a single penny to a politician
  
• I ran my favorite races this year (Run for Your Beads, St. Patrick’s Day 5 Miler, Macklind Mile and the Chicago Marathon)
  
• I dropped out of a Half Marathon (Go! St. Louis) due to health. It’s the first time that I registered and paid for a race that I didn’t run
  
• I cherished another “Grand-Friends” day at Daniel’s school
  
• I spent more money on dogs this past year than people and that makes me feel good
  
• I watched the “Nutcracker Ballet Live” with Sadie and Allison
  
• I enjoyed another year at Mardi Gras in St. Louis with Kevin and didn’t get as drunk as the year before
  
• I cried when Alan Rickman died
  
• I was sad when David Bowie, Meryl Haggard, Prince, Gene Wilder, Carrie Fisher and George Michael died
  

This has been a rollercoaster ride of a year for sure. For the most part, I enjoyed it. But a quote from one of my all-time favorite movies “Parenthood” – the one with Steve Martin, not that knock off crap show, sums up the 2016 ride ~

I continue to be blessed more than I deserve. I never take that for granted. My life is far from perfect but without the downs, the ups would not seem as special. I never forget that. My only hope for 2017 is that my friends, family and I stay active and healthy.

I am very optimistic about 2017 both for the country and for myself.

2017……bring it!

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An Out of Control “Control-Freak”

“You ARE a control freak” ~ Daniel (my 9 year old grandson)

He said this to me during our first real argument a few months ago. Of course he had heard it from his daddy (my son).

After thinking on it, I guess it is true to a certain extent.

It’s been a while since I have written on my blog. It seems either I can’t find time or have nothing to blog about.

Since the Chicago marathon and really even before it, I’ve lost all control over my health and fitness level. I eat badly, I’ve gained weight and I barely exercise. I’m a bit depressed and I know it’s about my loss of control.

Are You a Control Freak? <—Take the quiz!

After I lost 127 pounds, I thought I knew the secret. During that time my appetite decreased, my energy level was high and I felt like I was 30 something. I have always counted my calories diligently but now I don’t record everything or I undercount the caloric value. Somehow, I seem to think just recording something is better than nothing. My desire for junk food has increased and my old “300 pound Charlotte self” has come back with a vengeance.

I got a surprising report that my cholesterol was high and blood glucose levels are elevated. Not since 2009 when I weighed 300 pounds have I had a worse report.

My clothes are tight. When your Flipbelt gets too tight, you are getting fat!

I feel like an old woman right now. I’m getting age spots and more and more wrinkles and gray hair. I am more forgetful. I don’t want to get old but I’m not doing anything to keep my vitality.

I still count my calories and run every now and then but it’s not the same. I’ve gained weight and I ate like I’d never eat again during the Christmas holidays. Each day is going to be the day that I get control. As soon as my stomach tells me it’s time to eat, I grab junk food.

I used to love running during the winter months but lately it’s all that I can do to get in a run on the weekend. It’s dark when I go to work and dark when I get home. My hours at work are longer and more stressful. I’m making excuses which I never did before. When I get home and feed the dogs, I get in my pajamas, make my dinner and sit on the couch the rest of the night. I really want that to stop.

I miss training for the marathon believe it or not. I’ve always said I was better when I trained even if I complained that I was training. I’ve thought about a personal trainer but I’ve gone that route before and didn’t like it.

I don’t like going to gyms. I had a membership for years and it was a waste of money. I found most people there smelly and rude. They spend time on equipment that I was waiting for texting or socializing. I hate people who grunt while lifting weights or wear too much make up or cologne. I hate people dropping weights on the floor heavily. I hated people bringing their kids (clearly posted as forbidden) and being afraid to do kettlebells afraid of hitting one of them in the head. I grew tired of watching kids trying to use equipment or running around screaming. There was a daycare there but people apparently didn’t want to pay $2 dollars for them to stay there an hour or so. And you know just like clockwork, all those New Year’s resolution Gym Rats will be back in January.

And P.S. – please wipe off your machines when you leave and re-rack your weights. I also detest men with big chest and arms who have bird legs. Do some calf raises for pete’s sake.

Gym Rat

I would come home from the gym more stressed than before I went. And even still, I have a very nice gym in my basement with everything I need and I still don’t do it.

So, I’m struggling for control again. Wish me luck!

I was contacted by another online running health magazine to do a series of 3 articles as a contributing writer. I feel guilty even accepting it since I don’t feel like a runner right now. I’m a runner in my heart but you are only a runner if you run.

Yesterday, I started again trying to hold myself accountable. I counted every bit that went into my mouth. I ran yesterday. I’m doing well today. But I find myself unusually hungry which is common for a junk-foodaholic, like me.

This is day #2. I need to get control because being a “Control Freak” is better than being an “Out of Control Freak”

RIP George Michael. I fell in love with you in the 80s.

RIP Carrie Fisher (Princess Leia) – I used to pretend to be you while playing with my son (when he was little).

“Your focus determines your reality.” – Qui-Gon Jinn (Star Wars – The Phantom Menace)